So you saw a banana eh? Or maybe you wanna be prepared for the apocalyptic day when you do. Either way, I'm glad your here. First things first - I'll give you pointers, and then answer some questions.

There are a number of ways you can react to different situations. I've listed them below for easy viewing:

1. Run. Banana's make for a good chase, so only use this option, and I mean *only* if you're feeling up to it at the time. Please be careful out there man.

2. Hide, then run.

3. Attack the banana with a nearby beet. You can always count on beet merchants to be around when you need one.

4. Begin singing the introductory paragraph to "Che' aluos un tridias". I love that song.

5. Find out if Bananas burn.

6. Attempt to create a matter/antimatter reaction with anything useful nearby. Let this be a lesson to carry some antimatter around regularly.

7. Eat it.

8. Threaten to put it next to overripe bananas, hence speed up the speed at which the original banana will ripen.

9. Try and grow some wings, some blue feathers, and a beak. Banana's get along well with Rainbow lorekites.

10. Try to sell it girl guide cookies. Send the precedes to me.

11. Declare in public that it hates Football then watch it get beaten to mush.

12. Start talking to the banana, regularly saying "Marsha Marsha Marsha", "dig me groovy chicks" and "sne?"

13. Out stretch your arms pretending to be a world war I fighter jet and poke it as you run past.

14. Call for help. We have trained agents everywhere.

Questions:

1. What does a banana look like?

If you're unaware of this don't worry about it. Whatever happens in the future is just meant to happen, something about thining out the gene pool or some such.

2. Are we only allowed to to what's on the list?

No, you can do whatever you like - but only after 5pm on Mondays on every 3rd Saturday which falls on the 15th of the month.

3. Are we restricted to doing only 1 thing at a time?

Not at all, feel free to mix and match. Be creative if you can - it will throw the bananas off. Just try not to get too ambitious. Remember, it's your safety we're talking about and dealing with a banana is no time to be experimenting with strange and untested theories.